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when i rummaged for a certification

wishes

I couldn't sleep last night. It was 1 am and my mind was racing, lost in a maze of thoughts and worries. The darkness outside was absolute, and the silence seemed to amplify the sound of my racing heartbeat. I felt lonely and isolated, like I was the only person awake in the world. It was a strange feeling, and it made me think about my life and the people around me.

I couldn't help but remember the sound of my mother's voice on the phone earlier that day. She sounded sad and tired, and it made me feel helpless. My grandmother was sick, and I knew it was weighing heavily on her. I wished I could turn back the clock, to the time when I was a child and everything seemed so simple and carefree. It was a time when the world was a kinder and more loving place, and I didn't yet know the bitter taste of life's hardships.

As I lay there, I also thought about my friends. I knew that some of them were going through difficult times, and it pained me that I couldn't be there for them. I wanted to wipe away their tears and offer a comforting embrace, but I was stuck in my own little world, unable to reach out and make a difference.

In that moment, I wished I could be perfect. I wished I could be a source of happiness for everyone, someone who could diminish all the sadness and pain in the world. But I knew that was impossible. Life was a balance of light and dark, and there was no way to experience happiness without also experiencing sadness.

All I wanted was to be in someone's embrace, to feel the warmth and comfort of another person, to know that everything was going to be okay. And if I couldn't have that for myself, then I wished I could be the one to offer that comfort to others.

Eventually, I fell asleep, exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster of the night. But the thoughts and feelings stayed with me, and I knew that they would continue to weigh on my mind for a long time to come.

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